Being Kind vs Being a People Pleaser

How do you feel when a stranger holds the door open for you? Or someone gives you a compliment when you’re having a hectic morning? Pretty good huh? You begin to exhibit the same behavior and show kindness to others so they too can feel good. At what point however do you stop being nice and start being a people pleaser? We’re all guilty of saying yes when our family and friends ask us to do things when we should say no but we are only trying to help right? What happens when you stop being “kind”, are you disappointing those who once knew you would say yes to anything or are you setting healthy boundaries so that you’re also being kind to yourself.

Here are some signs of kindness:

• Holding the door open for others
• Compliment a stranger
• Offer to help someone in need
• Sharing a warm smile

Here are some signs of a people pleaser:

• Overextending yourself to help others
• Relying on approval from others
• Make decisions to make others happy at your own expense

There is nothing wrong with being kind. Kindness is an important aspect in human interactions and allows us to connect with others in a deep and meaningful way. There is nothing wrong with caring about someone’s opinion of you as long as it isn’t causing you to compromise your happiness and sense of self. Here are some helpful tips that can help you balance being kind vs being a people pleaser. Take time for self-care, as being kind to yourself is the most important. Fuel your body with healthy foods, sunshine and laughter when you can. Lastly, it’s okay to say no. If you aren’t able to help someone politely decline, this doesn't make you uncaring but knowing your boundaries is important and should be respected. Be kind to someone today and everyday…just don’t be a people pleaser!

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